Wednesday, January 23, 2013

A World That Never Was

People have own potential to have one attitude
But each attitude has been classified as Good or Bad
One may get good attitude or bad attitude as well
Which do you prefer?

January of 2013
This month would killed my attitude...
Early of this month was quite okay...
Not much different..
After since many have their works and studies..
While I'm still rotting in the house...
I wonder do they gave me some mentally pressure?
At middle of this month, I saw peoples' attitude changed...
Even mine as well
Well, I felt like I'm a selfish guy
The one who don't like to greet people
The one who don't like to tell others
The one who doesn't care about others things
Maybe?
I've experienced this pressure since I was Form 5
And I ever thought it has gone...
But still, it appears again...
What I see people posting, everything goes negative...
My mind just want to scold....
But come to think... It actually not my business...
Why the heck should I scold them?
Therefore, I've ignored these...

After few days of my researches, I found out something...
What I said that people who changed their attitude...
Actually it was me who keep changing my own attitude~
I'm wondering why these days I'll get mad easily...
Everyday someone called me, I'll just simply get angry in mind but say nothing...
I said myself was withstanding this pain...
From another side to think... I'll should scold out...
Does that?
Now I really hate the people around me...
They've just say their good....
Show-offing....
They even didn't think about why a guy who don't work during this holiday session...
Well, who cares?
I'm the one who want to wait driving license to work...
But, to tell the truth...
I'm predicting that even I got my license...
I'll have a hard time too....

I'm jealous...
I'm jealous the people who had their fun....
I'm jealous that the people who can work....
I'm jealous that the people can earn a lot moneys in this holiday...
What if? I do nothing at here.....
Ended up I've earned nothing...
I hate my own personalities...
I'm too quiet...
Maybe I've pick wrong decision...
My plan for this holiday was ruined....
Therefore... mental pressures live in my brain...
Tears are goona fall....
But I'm still not letting it to fall...
I can't....
Although they're really hurt....
I want to scold them...
But...
I can't find any wrong point from them...
I shouldn't say anyone was stupid..
Because I'm the only one who're being a freaking dumb....
Am I wrong?

I'm lost... in a maze that covered mist....
And damaged by traps....
I'm sick of it....
What can I do now? 

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